2016 dating – More choice, less decisions

I can sometimes be a bit indecisive; especially when it comes to food.  It’s something I consciously try improve upon (but surely to consciously decide better is in itself a juxtapose?).  I think this comes down to the fact that I am solely responsible for the enjoyment of the sandwich or item I am to choose.  Layered bread with filler ultimately is as is, I am the one that gives it relevance by my interpretation of the appearance, smell, taste and other sensations it gives off.

Now for women… I’m less picky.

Hold your manifesting thoughts, let them fizzle away and hear me out.

I do not pre-judge anyone. We as human beings have such complicated lives, containing intertwining narratives, even read our own story can be so difficult to interpret, understanding what we have done and how we came to be in this present moment.  Applied to strangers there is a beautiful word; “Sonder”, and that is to merely observe this phenomenon, unable to fathom the plethora of emotions a passer by may or may not be experiencing.

We should not pre-judge anyone. With potential partners it is an open palette, we can accept that we do not know what to expect, even if we already have expectations and that is what makes dating so exciting.  It is a familiar looking and inviting sandwich, yet its contents, its flavour and sensations are completely unknown, no matter how hard we try to convince ourselves that we do know.

This is exactly what is wrong with Tinder, and arguably its user base.  We are browsing the same bread menu, praying that a brioche bun appears so we can use our special super like button.  But Tinder does not limit the number of potential matches, we theoretically have an infinitive amount of swipes.   The self inflicted faux pas, greed.

Matches accumulate, as do messages.  The layout and nature of Tinder allows for users to collect these, a dating Pokemon Go?  Why should an app specifically for dating, an area to meet the “special someone” or “the one”, encourage an ever growing palette of matches?  Love at first sight? or love by “eeenie, meanie, miney mo?”

My final and conclusive reason to why app dating is flawed, the salutary swipe.  I often ask myself when it comes to meeting a potential partner; “if I want to find someone like me, where would she be? out on the pull? indoors on the swipe?”  Neither of those options.

The Tinder swipe is comparable to the Facebook/Twitter scroll; we don’t know the true objective of the scroll, it gives a level of pleasure, it is to some respect infinite, but most importantly of all… it does not promote meaningful life observations, the ultimate premise to dating.

Love at first sight, finding the courage to speak to someone who has that potential spark,  that rushing feeling that you may miss this critical moment that can change your life forever.  We all have our own fears, excitements and anxieties that naturally take hold when we are confronted by these situations… that is the moment, the moment that matters, the moment that makes you feel alive, the moment that can change everything.

You cannot swipe that moment, stop being greedy, put the phone down, observe life and see the beauty that exists in everybody.




The Knowledge

The final few runs

So within the the next 2 weeks I will have completed the infamous blue books.

I obtained the blue book with all 320 runs in August 2014, it went from drawer to drawer, including a 3 month stint in the bottom drawer within the room I rented in Whitechapel whilst I was working in the square mile. (Flat – Tilney St, E1.  Office – Barnards Inn, Fetter Lane EC4 for those like me that get the tingly feeling inside when someone mentions anything contained with the 6 mile radius)

It was such a shame that I didn’t begin the blue book until I relocated back home, January 2015, 50 miles from the Charing Cross purview.  The first runs and attempts were feeble, done in car in daytime, getting to approximately 20 before losing track and motivation.  Talk of Uber, driverless cars, and other non impacting reasons not to undertake this mission.

I’m not too sure how I came back from this lull period, all I can say now is that I’m glad that I did.  Every day my knowledge grows stronger, my life is minimised to focus on the goal that lies ahead, its a transformation that I am grateful for and I believe I can apply to any future challenge or ambition that may arise later in life.

The first steps are always the hardest, when you know hardly any street names and have so many new areas to encounter, there’s no reference or point to pin yourself back to, its frustrating to not even know which direction you are facing, no matter how confident your internal compass is.  The tip I now know… take it in piece by piece, slowly… it is a puzzle, you can only work with the pieces you have.  Put it away for a few days, pull it back out and add to those pieces.

Set and meet small goals, the bigger goals will then achieve themselves.

I can’t wait to share my progression with you, thank you for reading, I leave you with this photo of myself on Southgate Road (not even the rain can deter my knowledge spirits).


The Knowledge

Why Study the Knowledge?

My decision to study The Knowledge of London wasn’t a definitive and sudden thought bubble, merely a collection of opinions and personal aims that steered me towards the enduring study.

One of these was whilst working as an interim sales representative for a large TV/AV brand, I stayed with a friend who lived nearer to one of the stores I had been scheduled to visit.  My travel, time and accommodation wasn’t compensated for, and during my overnight stay I had the pleasure to speak with my friend’s father; a London Black Cab driver.

“You should look into becoming a Cabbie, isn’t it a lot of work having to travel around for a basic sales job?”

I didn’t initially give it much thought, career curveballs are thrown by; friends, family and colleagues all the time, it just went into the mental drawer of other job possibilities.

I’m not sure how it stuck, but it one of the many components that has lead me to the position of study I am in today.